The End of the World

Most people agree that the world will not end today, despite the Mayans’ prediction. Some have even interpreted the Mayan calendar to mean that the world will not end, but rather that today will mark the beginning of a new era.  Some say that December 21, 2012 will be the end of fighting, war, bigotry, and violence; and the beginning of brother/sisterhood, love, and compassion.  Given the events we have seen this year, I certainly hope this is true.

A week ago today, 20 beautiful young children and six adults were murdered in an elementary school in Connecticut.  Every day, women are being murdered by spouses and boyfriends—people who they are supposed to be able to trust.  Every day, soldiers are being ripped away from their families to fight wars, many of whom never return home.  I truly, truly hope this will all end.  It has to. 

I want today to be an end of sorts for me, too.  I want – no, I’m going to make today be an end to self-criticism and blame, depression, anxiety, and fear.  Oh yes, please let it be the end of fear.  So much of the pain in our lives is caused by fear.  Fear of being a failure. Fear of being hurt.  Fear that you’re not good enough, strong enough, kind enough, attractive enough … just, enough.  And I believe much of the tragedy and violence we’ve seen in our world is caused by this fear as well.  Fear that leads to insecurities.  Fear that leads us to turn on ourselves and one another.  Fear that is consuming our lives and our world.  It’s time for this world to end. 

Today, I commit to starting a new life, a new world for me and those around me—a world based on love, not on fear.  I commit to turning all negative or fearful thoughts into loving ones.  Instead of thinking, “ugh, I didn’t make it to the gym” or “I can’t believe I ate that,” I will think, “I love and am grateful for my body.” This love will inevitably encourage me to care for my body much more than any amount of self-criticism or blame ever could.

Instead of being afraid to take chances in my career, I will be grateful and courageous.  Instead of thinking, “I can’t,” I will think, “I am capable of anything, and I will.”

 Instead of being afraid of failing as a mother, I will be loving and grateful.  I will follow the motto I am constantly sharing with expectant parents: Just love them, then love them some more. And when you don’t know what else to do, just keep on loving them.  With this much love, there can be no room for fear. 

Instead of being afraid in my marriage, I will be grateful for my amazing husband and partner. Being separated so many times by deployments, unaccompanied tours, and schools makes it difficult not to fear.  But, instead of thinking, “I can’t believe he’s gone again,” I will think, “I know he didn’t want to go, and we will get through this together.” 

Instead of being afraid to reach out to friends for help and support, I will feel grateful for the love in my life, and send out love and gratitude in return.  I will surround myself with love—both by giving and receiving. 

Starting today, I choose not to be afraid. I choose to think, feel, react, and live by love. I don’t have power over whether the world will change today.  But, I have power over whether I do.  And today, I choose to make a new beginning.  Starting today, I choose a new world.  I choose love. 

Happy December 21, 2012. Let’s make it a great one.